April 23, 2013... I was at work. I happened to be making dinner for the family I nanny-ed for. I checked my email real quick. I had an email from Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary was emailing to congratulate me on my acceptance. I remember being overwhelmed with emotion. I screamed on the inside. I sent a mass text to a group of friends. And, then I was overwhelmed with fear. This dream that God had placed inside of me was becoming a reality.
If you've been around .Redeemed. for a while, you know the story of God calling me to SWBTS, me telling God no, God persisting, me applying, me getting accepted and me moving halfway across the country to start a new adventure. Not new to .Redeemed., well... God called me to SWBTS in November 2012, I told God "there's no way", God told me "there's a way", I applied, I was accepted on April 23, 2013, and I moved halfway across the country in July 20, 2013.
So, it has been a year since I was accepted to Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. What a year it has been. I would like to replay the last year for you.
So, I was accepted to SWBTS on April 23, 2013. In May, I went to dinner with my parents. They thought I was taking them out to tell them that I had a boyfriend. Instead, I told them that I was moving to Fort Worth, Texas. Also, in May, after being unable to put it off any longer, I told my boss that I was moving for graduate school. Everyone was so happy for me. It was so reassuring to have so many people supporting what God was doing in my life.
June was quite a month. For the sake of consistency for the children I was nanny-ing, they got a new nanny. Fear of being jobless overcame me, but the Lord provided. I began working for my parents, and picked up many babysitting and housesitting jobs. I received an email from SWBTS with my name on it in June. At the end of June, I moved out of my home for a year and a half and couch surfed for the month of July.
July was filled with emotion. It was in July that I would pack up a moving truck and travel halfway across the country to start a new adventure. I would be leaving behind friends and family to chase after a dream of mine. This was exciting, but terrifying. I spent a lot of time with family and friends. And, on July 20th, we set out for a three day adventure to Texas.
I was homesick, lost and lonely the majority of August and September. The roommate situation wasn't fabulous, I had no friends, and I wasn't going to a church within the SBC *gasp*. I wasn't finding my place in Fort Worth, Texas.
Things got better in October. I was finding my place, making friends, embracing the place God had called me to and standing my ground... even when it wasn't in line with the Southern Baptist Way.
I got to fly home in November for Thanksgiving. I am not one to cry in public. But, after a not so grand flight experience... and being away from my family for far too long, I balled like a baby when I saw my brother at the airport at midnight in Augusta. It was grand to share a midnight snack with him in the ghetto of Aiken at Waffle House. It was absolutely wonderful to see my grandma, and my mom and dad, and baby brother. Being back home with family for Thanksgiving was perfect. Because my birthday is a week after Thanksgiving, we celebrated my 24th birthday a few days early.
December flew by with exams, a family Christmas cruise, catching with friends and sleeping the days away. Before I knew it, my five week break in Charlotte was up, and it was time to fly back to school.
January brought all sorts of transition. When I arrived back in Fort Worth, I finally got to see my fabulous new apartment with my fabulous new roommate. Thanks to wonderful friends, all of my furniture was already in our apartment. The next day, I began my second semester at SWBTS, enrolled in thirteen hours, like a crazy person. January, also, came packaged with an interview or two. One door was closed because...
February brought a dream job!!! After four years of praying for a position in ministry, God so eloquently placed the opportunity in my hands.
March was a month of stretching. Stretching of my time. Stretching of my faith. I had to remind myself that I am who God says I am. I am qualified because God has called me. I may not be your cookie cutter Christian seminary student, but I am a child of God who has a unique call from her Heavenly Father.
Showing posts with label Personal Reflection. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Personal Reflection. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 23, 2014
Friday, March 21, 2014
Be Present - Reflection
On Monday, I shared with you how Pastor Craig Groeschel challenged the men and women of his church to pick one verse and one word to guide their decisions, actions and thoughts throughout 2014. I shared with you that my verse for 2014 is James 4:13-15 and my word is present.
Today, I would like to share with you how I am doing on being present. First, I would like to share with you what being present looks like in my life.
When I first decided that present was my one word, I realized that it is kind of vague. What does it mean to be present anyway?
So, I haven't been doing so hot so far. But, being present means that that is okay. Being present means that I am not going to sit around and mope about how being sick took over my spring break and I didn't get half as much done as I needed to. Being present means that I am not going to beat myself up every time I peak at my phone when a friend is over. Being present means that I am not going to regret the moments that I didn't put my computer aside when my roommate was talking to me, because I needed to keep working and could multi-task. Being present means that I am going to be present now and make some changes.
Today, I would like to share with you how I am doing on being present. First, I would like to share with you what being present looks like in my life.
When I first decided that present was my one word, I realized that it is kind of vague. What does it mean to be present anyway?
To me, being present means...
- Turning the phone on silent and facing it upside down or out of sight when with friends.
- Not worrying about the mile long to do list that tomorrow brings.
- Not dwelling on all that I should have done yesterday.
- Not being on social media when I have carved out time for homework or work.
Ultimately, being present is focusing on what is here and now, no matter what has happened or what is to come.
So, I haven't been doing so hot so far. But, being present means that that is okay. Being present means that I am not going to sit around and mope about how being sick took over my spring break and I didn't get half as much done as I needed to. Being present means that I am not going to beat myself up every time I peak at my phone when a friend is over. Being present means that I am not going to regret the moments that I didn't put my computer aside when my roommate was talking to me, because I needed to keep working and could multi-task. Being present means that I am going to be present now and make some changes.Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Present
At the beginning of 2014, Pastor Craig Groeschel, in the series Small Things Big Difference, challenged the men and women of his church to pick one verse. One verse to keep a biblical perspective one the year. One verse to guide through decision making. This one verse was to be accompanied by one word. One word to help you stay on track through the year. One word to keep you focused throughout the year. One verse and one word. Seems pretty easy, right?
Picking just one verse and one word was no easy task for me. I am a list maker. Every year I make a list of goals for myself, a list typically as long as I am years old. They are almost always a mix of attainable and audacious goals. More often than not, I come out of the year discouraged because I only accomplished the attainable goals, and left the audacious ones by the wayside. Picking one verse and one word to keep me focused throughout the year was no easy task.
I began evaluating all of the things I wanted to accomplish in 2014. After much deliberation and elimination, I made a list of eleven goals I had for 2014. Don't give me too much credit yet... I, also, vowed to set monthly goals that would help me achieve my yearly goals.
What had gotten into me?! I had gotten so far off the path of one verse and one word. The goal was far small things to make a big difference, and I was doing it the wrong way. So, I went back to the drawing board. Except, I kept my goals for 2014.
The biggest difference I wanted to see made in 2014 was my ability to be present. I am a girl with 12090985039 things going on in her head at once, and I am consistently thinking of the next 10293808 things that I need to do. My ability to be present is severely lacking. This reflects in my friendships, my studies and my work.
So, one verse for 2014...
Picking just one verse and one word was no easy task for me. I am a list maker. Every year I make a list of goals for myself, a list typically as long as I am years old. They are almost always a mix of attainable and audacious goals. More often than not, I come out of the year discouraged because I only accomplished the attainable goals, and left the audacious ones by the wayside. Picking one verse and one word to keep me focused throughout the year was no easy task.
I began evaluating all of the things I wanted to accomplish in 2014. After much deliberation and elimination, I made a list of eleven goals I had for 2014. Don't give me too much credit yet... I, also, vowed to set monthly goals that would help me achieve my yearly goals.
What had gotten into me?! I had gotten so far off the path of one verse and one word. The goal was far small things to make a big difference, and I was doing it the wrong way. So, I went back to the drawing board. Except, I kept my goals for 2014.
The biggest difference I wanted to see made in 2014 was my ability to be present. I am a girl with 12090985039 things going on in her head at once, and I am consistently thinking of the next 10293808 things that I need to do. My ability to be present is severely lacking. This reflects in my friendships, my studies and my work.
So, one verse for 2014...
Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." Why, you don't even know what will happen tomorrow. What is our life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that."
James 4:13-15
And, you guessed it, my one word for 2014 is...
PRESENT.
Tune in... Later this week, I will be sharing on how I am doing at being present.
Chime in... How are your 2014 resolutions going? Did you pick one word? How is that going?
Monday, February 17, 2014
Promise Fulfilled
In September of 2009, God made a promise to me that seemed impossible... impossible for God. The thoughts that ran through my head were, there is no way, God is wrong, I am not His girl. I was not qualified for the calling He had put on me.
Those thoughts were not from God. The thoughts placed in my heart were from the enemy. The enemy wanted me to feel disqualified, incapable and doubtful. Those are not thoughts from God. But, I dismissed this calling because of the thoughts floating around in my head.
Fast forward a few years and God was still pressing on me with this promise. But, I was still allowing the enemy speak into my life. I still felt unqualified and incapable of the task at hand. In 2011, God knew that I was stubborn and unwilling to budge. He intervened and derailed the plans I had for myself, setting me on the path to fulfill His promise.
Over the last four and a half years, I have felt as if God abandoned me, as if God had changed His mind on me, as if I was unqualified, unworthy and unable to complete the task at hand. I have rejoiced in His provision and worshipped in His protection. I have turned the honor and glory back to Him, when things were going well and when they were not. I have faith to belief and lacked faith to belief.
But, through all the ups and downs over the last four and a half years, a few things never changed. God never gave up on me. God never changed His mind. God's promise was constant. God's provision was steady. God qualified me by calling me. God never stopped being good.
Over 1,600 days after God called me to work in ministry, I was asked to joint he staff of First Baptist Church in Justin, Texas as the Associate Children's Minister. God showed me His faithfulness by fulfilling a promise He made to me four years, five months and one week ago. God is still good.
My encouragement to you... Don't give up hope on a promise God has made to you. Don't stop believing that He will fulfill a promise that He has made to you. He who has made a promise to you, will be faithful to complete it. Have faith.
Those thoughts were not from God. The thoughts placed in my heart were from the enemy. The enemy wanted me to feel disqualified, incapable and doubtful. Those are not thoughts from God. But, I dismissed this calling because of the thoughts floating around in my head.
Fast forward a few years and God was still pressing on me with this promise. But, I was still allowing the enemy speak into my life. I still felt unqualified and incapable of the task at hand. In 2011, God knew that I was stubborn and unwilling to budge. He intervened and derailed the plans I had for myself, setting me on the path to fulfill His promise.
Over the last four and a half years, I have felt as if God abandoned me, as if God had changed His mind on me, as if I was unqualified, unworthy and unable to complete the task at hand. I have rejoiced in His provision and worshipped in His protection. I have turned the honor and glory back to Him, when things were going well and when they were not. I have faith to belief and lacked faith to belief.
But, through all the ups and downs over the last four and a half years, a few things never changed. God never gave up on me. God never changed His mind. God's promise was constant. God's provision was steady. God qualified me by calling me. God never stopped being good.Over 1,600 days after God called me to work in ministry, I was asked to joint he staff of First Baptist Church in Justin, Texas as the Associate Children's Minister. God showed me His faithfulness by fulfilling a promise He made to me four years, five months and one week ago. God is still good.
My encouragement to you... Don't give up hope on a promise God has made to you. Don't stop believing that He will fulfill a promise that He has made to you. He who has made a promise to you, will be faithful to complete it. Have faith.
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Wait Pt. 4
This week, I have been sharing with you about waiting on God. Waiting isn't easy for many. We live in a day when we don't have to wait frequently. But, waiting is something we must do. We wait in the car on our commute to and from work, we wait for a call back, we wait for a red light to turn green, we wait for the water to boil... waiting is inevitable.
I'm no stranger to waiting. I've had to wait for the oven to preheat, wait for a friend to text me back, wait in traffic and wait on God. I have had God promise me something and not see it fulfilled immediately... But, nothing is wasted when God is involved. Waiting has its blessings and lessons. Today, I would like to share with you what I have learned from waiting for a promise from God to be fulfilled.
I have learned a lot about God's faithfulness. Sometimes a promise isn't fulfilled the next day or the next week or the next year. But, He is faithful to complete His promise.
I have learned that He is still good even in the waiting. Maybe, even more so in the waiting. I have seen his protection and provision first hand in the waiting.
I have learned to be in tune to God's words for my life. Having a consistent quiet time with God has changed my walk with God. I would not have heard God tell me to quiet my job, to lead an eGroup, to go to seminary and so many other things.
I have learned to be patient. I am a patient person when it comes to most, but then other times I have zero patience. Patience in my walk with Christ has been a learning experience. Just because most things are instant in our world, doesn't mean that all things are. God is still good in the waiting.
Chime In!! What have you learned from waiting on God?
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
Wait Pt. 3
This week, we are talking about waiting. I have shared with you the season of waiting that I am in. Today, I would like to share with you what Scripture says about waiting.
When I think about waiting, the first and greatest example that comes to mind is the story of Abraham and Sarah. God promised Abraham that he would be father of all the nations. When Sarah became impatient, she gave her servant to Abraham to bore a child. It wasn't until thirteen years after Ishmael's birth that Abraham and Sarah conceived Isaac. Abraham and Sarah were well advanced in age at this point. The story of Abraham and Sarah's season of waiting in the majority of the book of Genesis.
Joseph has another beautiful story on waiting. Joseph was sold by his brothers as a slave. God promised Joseph that he would be the leader of his people. At the time, Joseph was in a prison cell. Over time, with patience, Joseph became the leader of his people and of the people of Egypt.
How about the story in Joshua 6? Jericho was closed; no one in, no one out. God came to Joshua and told him to take the city that had already been given to him. Joshua was told to march around the city of six days, and to blow the trumpets on the seventh day, after marching around the city of seven times. Joshua did not share this information with his army. How do you think Joshua's army felt? What were their thoughts, do you think? Marching around a city of six days, and then seven times in one day trumpeting? What a story on waiting... Joshua 6:27 says, "God was with Joshua".
For a little encouragement to press through seasons of waiting...
James 5:11 says that we should consider it a blessing to preserve.
Galatians 6:9 warns us against becoming weary in doing good... the proper harvest will be reaped in due time.
Proverbs 3:5-6 encourages us to trust in the Lord with all of our heart, leaning not on our own understanding.
Psalm 40:1 says "I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry.
When I think about waiting, the first and greatest example that comes to mind is the story of Abraham and Sarah. God promised Abraham that he would be father of all the nations. When Sarah became impatient, she gave her servant to Abraham to bore a child. It wasn't until thirteen years after Ishmael's birth that Abraham and Sarah conceived Isaac. Abraham and Sarah were well advanced in age at this point. The story of Abraham and Sarah's season of waiting in the majority of the book of Genesis.
Joseph has another beautiful story on waiting. Joseph was sold by his brothers as a slave. God promised Joseph that he would be the leader of his people. At the time, Joseph was in a prison cell. Over time, with patience, Joseph became the leader of his people and of the people of Egypt.
How about the story in Joshua 6? Jericho was closed; no one in, no one out. God came to Joshua and told him to take the city that had already been given to him. Joshua was told to march around the city of six days, and to blow the trumpets on the seventh day, after marching around the city of seven times. Joshua did not share this information with his army. How do you think Joshua's army felt? What were their thoughts, do you think? Marching around a city of six days, and then seven times in one day trumpeting? What a story on waiting... Joshua 6:27 says, "God was with Joshua".
For a little encouragement to press through seasons of waiting...
James 5:11 says that we should consider it a blessing to preserve. Galatians 6:9 warns us against becoming weary in doing good... the proper harvest will be reaped in due time.
Proverbs 3:5-6 encourages us to trust in the Lord with all of our heart, leaning not on our own understanding.
Psalm 40:1 says "I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry.
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
Wait Pt. 2
This week, I am sharing with you the importance of waiting in your walk with Christ. Waiting is not easy for many of us. It's an acquired skill that many of us have to work on over time. Today, I would like to share with you how I have had to wait on God.
My entire life, I have desired to be a teacher. As long as I can remember, I was playing teacher with my brothers, my friends and my dolls when I couldn't find a living being. I was destined to be a teacher. When I was 15, I got a job at the Boys and Girls Club working full-time in the summers and part-time during the school year. My senior year of high school, I took a class that allowed me to have an internship in a classroom with four and five year olds. It was perfect, right up my alley! After graduating high school, my plan was to go to a university and major in Elementary Education. Teaching kindergarten was my dream.
In 2008, God told me that one day I would work in ministry. I couldn't believe this. My life was not fit to work in ministry. I was not living the most Christ-like life. As nervous as I was about this call, I just as much laughed it off and assumed that God got something wrong.
Early in 2009, I began serving in children's ministry. If God had called me to work in ministry, I might as well start somewhere. Passion and leadership was seen in me from various staff members of the church. Increased responsibility happened quickly!
A few years after I first felt God call me to ministry, I was two classes away from graduating with my Associates in Early Childhood Education. God had been pressing on me to change my major. I continually felt as if I was making the wrong decision. But, teaching was all that I knew. God couldn't possibly use me in any other way. After a series of events that only could have been orchestrated by God, I was dropped from these two classes and would have only been able to re-enroll next semester.
My entire life, I have desired to be a teacher. As long as I can remember, I was playing teacher with my brothers, my friends and my dolls when I couldn't find a living being. I was destined to be a teacher. When I was 15, I got a job at the Boys and Girls Club working full-time in the summers and part-time during the school year. My senior year of high school, I took a class that allowed me to have an internship in a classroom with four and five year olds. It was perfect, right up my alley! After graduating high school, my plan was to go to a university and major in Elementary Education. Teaching kindergarten was my dream.
In 2008, God told me that one day I would work in ministry. I couldn't believe this. My life was not fit to work in ministry. I was not living the most Christ-like life. As nervous as I was about this call, I just as much laughed it off and assumed that God got something wrong.
Early in 2009, I began serving in children's ministry. If God had called me to work in ministry, I might as well start somewhere. Passion and leadership was seen in me from various staff members of the church. Increased responsibility happened quickly!
A few years after I first felt God call me to ministry, I was two classes away from graduating with my Associates in Early Childhood Education. God had been pressing on me to change my major. I continually felt as if I was making the wrong decision. But, teaching was all that I knew. God couldn't possibly use me in any other way. After a series of events that only could have been orchestrated by God, I was dropped from these two classes and would have only been able to re-enroll next semester.
Okay, I get it God... You are preparing me for ministry...
I took a year and a half off of school, waiting for God to tell me what was next. What school? What degree program? What career path? I diligently worked in a preschool for this time, waiting for God to guide my next steps. I used this time waiting to research schools, research programs, research career paths... but God kept telling me not yet.
In the midst of this waiting, God kept reminding me that I was called to work in ministry. Three times, staff members at my church approached me about applying in children's ministry and student ministry. I applied three times. Sadly, the timing wasn't right. I wasn't even considered, even after given a high recommendation from staff.
When I finally heard from God, there was no denying it. I began attending Liberty University Online, majoring in Religion almost immediately. When graduation was in sight, I began to consider what was next. Seminary was always in the back of my mind. But, getting my Masters degree always seemed out of reach. I wasn't smart enough, I wasn't qualified for such a task. Now, I am enrolled at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary getting my Masters in Divinity with a Concentration in Children's Ministry.
I am still waiting, sometimes more patiently than others, for said position in ministry. There have been more moments than I would like to admit to that I have felt like God has abandoned me. There have been more moments than I would like to admit to that I have felt like God has given up on me. There have been more moments than I would like to admit to that I have felt like God has forgotten about me. But, I am repeatedly comforted by God's Word.
Chime In! How have you waited in your walk with Christ? What did you learn through waiting?
Coming Up... Tomorrow, I will share with you what Scripture says about God's promises. Thursday, I will share with you what you can learn while waiting on God.
Thursday, January 16, 2014
#Seminarylife Pt. 3
This week on the blog, I have had the opportunity to share with you what I learned though my first semester of classes at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary and what I have learned through experiences. Today, I will be sharing with you my overall reflections of seminary life.
As you have read this week, I have learned a lot from five months at seminary. I gained a lot of head knowledge. I learned a lot about what is important to me.
I would be lying if I said that there were moments when I did not regret my decision. It was not always daisy's and roses. There were moments when all I wanted was to have coffee with a friend from home or to go shopping with my mom, watch a movie with my roommate at 311 or play with the kids I nanny-ed, get froyo with a friend from home or go to my home church. There were times when professors were challenging my church choice but God was confirming my church choice, and I figured life would be easier if I quit and went home.
I am glad I stuck it out. I am stronger on the other side of the semester than I was going into it. I can't wait for my second semester of seminary to begin on January 23rd. I am thankful that God chose me to do His work. I am thankful for every tough lesson I had to learn this semester.
The best is yet to come!
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
#SeminaryLife Pt. 2
This week, we are talking about my reflections from my first completed semester of seminary at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. Yesterday, I shared what I learned from an educational view. Today, I am going to share with you what I learned at my first semester of seminary through experience.
You have probably heard seminary referred to as cemetery a time or two in your life. When I was telling people that I was going to go to seminary, they would ask, "You mean cemetery?" Those who had been to seminary, or who knew someone who went to seminary, would warn me against going to seminary. "It will be the driest season of your life," they would caution. I was on a mission from God and would not allow their opinion sway me. Wit these warnings in mind though, I went prepared to have one of the driest seasons of my life. I was prepared to feel like I was in the desert with no water in sight. But, I also did all that I could to keep the water as close as possible.
Before moving, I made sure that I was daily dedicating ample time to God. I wasn't just reading my Bible and praying, I was silently listening to God. I made a daily routine. Upon arriving at seminary, I had to work fervently to keep this routine. I began waking up earlier and earlier just so that I would not miss my quiet time with God. This was one of the wisest things I did in my first semester of seminary.
Another thing I did upon arriving, was immediately get involved in church. Being a Christian is largely about being involved in local ministry, sharing the Gospel, tithing and being surrounded by a body of believers. Yes, I am surrounded by a body of believers at seminary. But, the body of believers I am surrounded by at seminary are different than the body of believers I am surrounded by at church. I wanted a mixture of friends, and more opportunities to get out into the community.
With my relationship with God on guard, I failed to keep my relationship with myself on guard. When most seminary students were struggling with finding time for God, I was struggling with finding time for myself. I was waking up an hour and a half before I had to leave every morning to spend time with God, spending all day at school, coming home to work for a few hours, doing homework or studying for a few hours, and then it was time for bed. The only personal quiet time I had was grocery shopping, but I never had a clear head. It was not until the middle of the semester that I realized I was facing a personal drought in my life. To remedy this, I evaluated my commitments and prioritized my time. I built time in for myself each week. It wasn't easy, but it was necessary.
In my first semester at seminary, I got a real taste of what the "church world" is like. My views on what the "church world" was like prior to going to seminary were limited to one very contemporary church. This semester, I learned how important having a denomination allegiance was to "church people." I learned that even though they are at seminary and want to be (or are in) full-time ministry, they may not be the nicest people. Thankfully, after a few months, I found a stellar group of seminary friends. This reminded me that it is always better to have a few close friends than a lot of not-so-close friends.
The last thing that I learned through experience this semester is how to stand up for what I believe in. There were moments when standing up for what God has called me to do meant going against the grain and not being the most popular in a crowd. I am okay with that. God will always provide and protect.
Chime In! What would you like to know more about my personal experiences at seminary?
Coming Up... I will be sharing my overall reflections on my first semester of #seminarylife.
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
#SeminaryLife Pt. 1
I attend Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, where I am getting my Masters in Divinity with a concentration in Children's Ministry. For my first semester, I enrolled in Biblical Hermeneutics, Biblical Hebrew, Administration of Early Childhood Weekday Program and Spiritual Formation.
Prior to coming to seminary, I always explained hermeneutics as "interpretation of the Bible." While in Biblical Hermeneutics this semester, I learned that I had been explaining hermeneutics incorrectly. Hermeneutics is the study of Scripture and explaining the meaning of Scripture. I understand hermeneutics now to be the study and application of Scripture.
I learned a lot of interesting things in Biblical Hebrew. In general, I have a better understanding of some basic Hebrew words in the Old Testament. I am able to confidently translate Hebrew to English, not so much English to Hebrew, but that's okay. The most interesting thing I learned this semester is about the word Jehovah. Did you know that Jehovah and Yahweh were originally the same word? Jehovah is a misinterpretation of Yahweh.
In Administration of Early Childhood Weekday Program, I learned how to direct a daycare/preschool/weekday program that is associated with a church. This was an interesting class, that I had to consistently open my mind to. I think that I will never be able to use this information, but I have no idea what God has in store for me in the future. What if one day I end up the director of a Children's Ministry that has a weekday program? We learned how to make a budget, motivate staff and how to create a positive working environment.
Coming into this semester, I thought Spiritual Formation would be the easiest class. It was one credit hour, couldn't be much work, right? Man, was I wrong. For Spiritual Formation, we got to attend chapel three times a week, meet weekly in a class setting or with an accountability partner, and have weekly assignments only. The meat of the class was learning different Spiritual Disciplines. This class opened my eyes to the different spiritual disciplines and ways I can improve disciples.
Chime In! Do you have any questions about the classes I took?
Coming Up... I will be sharing things I learned through experiences at seminary and my overall reflections of seminary life. Stay tuned!!
Monday, January 13, 2014
#SeminaryLife Intro
In July, I moved from North Carolina to Texas because God told me to. It has been quite an adventure. There have been fabulous moments, there have been not so fabulous moments, but I am so glad that God called me here.
This week, I will be talking about #SeminaryLife. I will be sharing with you things I learned in the classroom, things I learned through experience and some overall reflections of #seminarylife.
Please stay tuned this week! It's going to be fun.
Chime In! What do you want to know about Seminary Life?
This week, I will be talking about #SeminaryLife. I will be sharing with you things I learned in the classroom, things I learned through experience and some overall reflections of #seminarylife.
Please stay tuned this week! It's going to be fun.
Chime In! What do you want to know about Seminary Life?
Monday, December 30, 2013
Twenty-Three
Last year, I set twenty-three goals for my twenty-third birthday. I know you're wondering how I've done.
1. Finish my last twelve classes at Liberty University Online with a bang
I did it! I successfully finished my last semester at Liberty University with a bang. I got all A's and B's and a college diploma.
2. Start grad school or seminary
I did it! I'm at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary!
3. Make and maintain a budget
I could have done a little better at this! I went through phases of being on budget and not and then getting back on track.
4. Run two 5k's
I could have done a little better at this!
5. Live in the moment
This wasn't the easiest. I am always looking forward to what is next, but I think that I often lived in the moment often. When I wasn't living in the moment, I recognized how consumed in what was coming or what had come
6. Read the entire New Testament
Oh no! I completely forgot about this!
7. De-stress
I can't say I did so well with this one. Seminary hasn't been easy.
8. Visit a new state (I have 44 to choose from)
Success! I visited Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana, and I now live in Texas!
9. Learn to check my email and social media sites no more than three times a day
Mercy, I forgot about this one, too!
10. Lose and keep off twenty-three pounds
Darn! That was not a success.
11. Read ten books for leisure
This year I read eight books. I set a goal for ten and read eight. I would say that is a success. I would highly recommend Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg and The Single Woman by Mandy Hale. My year was different because of these books.
12. Take pictures regularly
I may have annoyed everyone around me, but I take pictures more than regularly!
13. Laugh until I cry
Yes! Thank goodness for great friends. I was laughing until I cried regularly.
14. Spend the weekend in Aiken
Right before I went from North Carolina to Texas, I spent the weekend in Aiken. It was great. I went canoeing with my middle brother, pretended to be a tourist in our hometown's "downtown", went to the movies with both of my brothers, and stayed up late sipping tea with my grandma.
15. Create opportunities for God to move mightily
If #NCtoTX wasn't one of the greatest opportunities for God to move mightily in my life, I can't tell you what was.
16. Learn to white water kayak
Texas does not have many places to white water kayak, so this was not a goal I was able to achieve.
17. Spend some QT with Victoria before she moves
I am so thankful that I was able to drive down and watch my best friend walk across the stage. She was also able to come up for the weekend and explore Charlotte with me. We had a great time!
18. Follow God's lead
Again, #NCtoTX... Right?! And, there were several other moments this year where God called me to go against the grain and I did. I've felt His confirmation when needed and I know He is proud of me for following His lead even when other options would be easier.
19. Have enough faith to believe that God can make my Sun Stand Still prayer come true
Still believing.
20. Visit Charleston at least twice
It is one of my biggest regrets that I did not make it to Charleston at all this year.
21. Get my second tattoo
After I finally figured out what I wanted for my second tattoo, I never had the time or money to get it done. The time will come!
22. Find time for me once a week
I was doing really great at this prior to moving, then I got terrible. When I noticed my mood was changing because I wasn't spending time with myself, I made sure to make time for myself weekly.
1. Finish my last twelve classes at Liberty University Online with a bang
I did it! I successfully finished my last semester at Liberty University with a bang. I got all A's and B's and a college diploma.
2. Start grad school or seminary
I did it! I'm at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary!
3. Make and maintain a budget
I could have done a little better at this! I went through phases of being on budget and not and then getting back on track.
4. Run two 5k's
I could have done a little better at this!
5. Live in the moment
This wasn't the easiest. I am always looking forward to what is next, but I think that I often lived in the moment often. When I wasn't living in the moment, I recognized how consumed in what was coming or what had come
6. Read the entire New Testament
Oh no! I completely forgot about this!
7. De-stress
I can't say I did so well with this one. Seminary hasn't been easy.
8. Visit a new state (I have 44 to choose from)
Success! I visited Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana, and I now live in Texas!
9. Learn to check my email and social media sites no more than three times a day
Mercy, I forgot about this one, too!
10. Lose and keep off twenty-three pounds
Darn! That was not a success.
11. Read ten books for leisure
This year I read eight books. I set a goal for ten and read eight. I would say that is a success. I would highly recommend Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg and The Single Woman by Mandy Hale. My year was different because of these books.
12. Take pictures regularly
I may have annoyed everyone around me, but I take pictures more than regularly!
13. Laugh until I cry
Yes! Thank goodness for great friends. I was laughing until I cried regularly.
14. Spend the weekend in Aiken
Right before I went from North Carolina to Texas, I spent the weekend in Aiken. It was great. I went canoeing with my middle brother, pretended to be a tourist in our hometown's "downtown", went to the movies with both of my brothers, and stayed up late sipping tea with my grandma.
15. Create opportunities for God to move mightily
If #NCtoTX wasn't one of the greatest opportunities for God to move mightily in my life, I can't tell you what was.
16. Learn to white water kayak
Texas does not have many places to white water kayak, so this was not a goal I was able to achieve.
17. Spend some QT with Victoria before she moves
I am so thankful that I was able to drive down and watch my best friend walk across the stage. She was also able to come up for the weekend and explore Charlotte with me. We had a great time!
18. Follow God's lead
Again, #NCtoTX... Right?! And, there were several other moments this year where God called me to go against the grain and I did. I've felt His confirmation when needed and I know He is proud of me for following His lead even when other options would be easier.
19. Have enough faith to believe that God can make my Sun Stand Still prayer come true
Still believing.
20. Visit Charleston at least twice
It is one of my biggest regrets that I did not make it to Charleston at all this year.
21. Get my second tattoo
After I finally figured out what I wanted for my second tattoo, I never had the time or money to get it done. The time will come!
22. Find time for me once a week
I was doing really great at this prior to moving, then I got terrible. When I noticed my mood was changing because I wasn't spending time with myself, I made sure to make time for myself weekly.
23. Live a life that glorifies God at all moments
I cannot honestly say that every single moment of 2013 glorified God. There were moments when I lost my temper, said something harsh and misused resources (time... money... etc.) that God gave me. But, I think what glorifies God in those moments is recognizing that I made a poor choice and immediately deciding to stop making the poor choice.
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Thankful Tuesday: #NCtoTX Edition
I have so much to be thankful for in this season. I have to stop and thank those who played a key part in #NCtoTX. So, I present to you... #NCtoTX Edition of Thankful Tuesday!
... Moving in and unpacking would not have gone as smoothly as it did with out the help of my amazing family. I am so incredibly thankful that my parents and brother took the trek from North Carolina to Texas with me. I know how much of a sacrifice it was for them... taking off of work, paying for food and hotels, and purchasing plane tickets home for three. I can not adequately express my gratitude toward them for making the sacrifice and being such a vital part of this journey. I could not have done it without them. Everything happened so smoothly... the truck was unloaded in record time, within three days all of my boxes were unpacked and before the week was over, all my pictures were hung on the wall and it felt like home!
... The countless people who knew just when I needed a dose of encouragement. The perfectly timed phone calls, cards, texts, emails, facebook messages, tweets and snapchats were so important to this journey. I would not have had the fuel that I had in low places to press forward without those who encouraged me along the way. Deciding to make this journey was a daily decision and I have some amazing people on my side believing in me to do great things.
... To everyone who prayed for me, thought of me, put good energy out, and sent good thoughts my way, thank you. To everyone who sent me off with love and well wishes, thank you! To everyone who believed in me even when I didn't believe in myself, thank you! To everyone who knew that Texas was a done deal before it was a consideration in my mind, thank you. To everyone who helped me along the way, thank you. To everyone who has been a part of this journey, thank you. Thank you, everyone! I am the most blessed a woman can be!Friday, August 9, 2013
#NCtoTX Actually Happens
Friday, July 19th, 2013... My parents, my baby brother and I woke up early and headed to the nearest Penske rental place. We picked up the truck and drove to the storage unit. In extremely hot and humid weather, empty stomachs and no hydration we strategically packed up the truck. Water and some breakfast would have been a smart move, but nerves were high and we weren't thinking clearly.
Saturday, July 20th, 2013... We filled our tanks up with gas, filled our coolers up with ice, filled our bellies up with breakfast and started day one of a three day trip from Charlotte, North Carolina to Fort Worth, Texas. This day started out to a rough start. Thirty minutes into the trip, my brother realized he forgot his license... a vital part of his flight home. My mom and I turned around. Turning around and Charlotte traffic put my mom and I an hour behind my dad and brother.
We drove through South Carolina with ease. Georgia was not as kind to us. The traffic in Atlanta was everything I imagined it to be. Somehow or another, my dad and brother made it through Atlanta before the traffic. My mom and I got another hour behind in Atlanta. Saturday night, we spent the night in Birmingham, Alabama.
Sunday, July 21st, 2013, we got back on the road. I am overly competitive, hate loosing and have a need for speed. Travelling with two cars made this quite a trip for me. Saturday started our journey off to a rough start, getting in after the truck and all... Sunday, I was determined to make it to Louisiana before my dad and brother. My mom and I peeled out of the parking lot before the GPS had made us a route. 
The drive through Alabama, Mississippi and Louisiana was L O N G. There was a lot of large green pastures! We did pass over the Mississippi River! Louisiana's open roads brought realization that impromptu mother-daughter mani/pedi's, dinner dates and shopping trips were going to be few and far between, and not so impromptu anymore made my mom and I cry.
Monday, July 22nd, 2013... The day that I had been counting down for months, the day that I had been praying about for months, the day that I moved into my apartment on the campus of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. Texas heat does not play! And, it showed no mercy to us on move in day. 
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Fears, Doubts and Details
The week or so leading up to July 20th, I was an emotional wreck. I have always tried my hardest to keep it together. I have this (incorrect) idea that I have to always appear picture perfect to those around me. The only time for tears or fear is alone. I've felt this even more than ever recently, as I have made this big deal about following God's lead.
As moving day became closer and closer, I developed this false idea that I could not be scared of what was ahead or doubt the decision I had made. I was making this bold step in faith and I felt like a lot of people were watching this. I wanted to make all of those people proud. I feared that they would not be proud if I was scared. I feared that they would not be encouraged to step out in faith if I doubted my decision.
I say all of that in the past tense, but I realize as I write those words, it is still I very real notion inside of me... the idea that I cannot be scared for the sake of those watching this journey of mine.
I would never lie to you, so I have to be completely honest. There were moments leading up to July 20th that I was scared... scared that I had forgotten a major detail and scared that I would forget to pack something essential. There were moments leading up to July 20th that I doubted my decision... what if I was wrong about God calling me to Texas, what if God didn't meet me in Texas, what if I hated it, there was a lot of doubt on my mind.
Leading up to July 20th was a whirlwind of emotion, but it wasn't all bad. God revealed Himself to me time and time again. Despite being terrible at budgeting and not having a job the last month and a half that I was in Texas, I had enough money to make the trip from North Carolina to Texas happen. My family and friends were such a blessing to me. Everyone was overly generous; opening their homes to me when I didn't have a place to sleep, feeding me, letting me dog, house and baby sit, and encouraging me when my doubts crept in!
A friend of mine recently told me that God is in the details. The moments that I silenced my fears and doubts were the moments that I had the opportunity to see God in the details of my life. He was truly moving in every area of my life.
Today, I've linked up with the following wonderful blogs!
As moving day became closer and closer, I developed this false idea that I could not be scared of what was ahead or doubt the decision I had made. I was making this bold step in faith and I felt like a lot of people were watching this. I wanted to make all of those people proud. I feared that they would not be proud if I was scared. I feared that they would not be encouraged to step out in faith if I doubted my decision.
I say all of that in the past tense, but I realize as I write those words, it is still I very real notion inside of me... the idea that I cannot be scared for the sake of those watching this journey of mine.
I would never lie to you, so I have to be completely honest. There were moments leading up to July 20th that I was scared... scared that I had forgotten a major detail and scared that I would forget to pack something essential. There were moments leading up to July 20th that I doubted my decision... what if I was wrong about God calling me to Texas, what if God didn't meet me in Texas, what if I hated it, there was a lot of doubt on my mind.
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow,
for tomorrow will worry about itself.
Matthew 6:34
Leading up to July 20th was a whirlwind of emotion, but it wasn't all bad. God revealed Himself to me time and time again. Despite being terrible at budgeting and not having a job the last month and a half that I was in Texas, I had enough money to make the trip from North Carolina to Texas happen. My family and friends were such a blessing to me. Everyone was overly generous; opening their homes to me when I didn't have a place to sleep, feeding me, letting me dog, house and baby sit, and encouraging me when my doubts crept in!
So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10
A friend of mine recently told me that God is in the details. The moments that I silenced my fears and doubts were the moments that I had the opportunity to see God in the details of my life. He was truly moving in every area of my life.
Monday, August 5, 2013
M.I.A No More!
I've been on quite a crazy ride over the last few months. I haven't been so great at keeping you in the loop, so let me give you a quick run down.
Last summer, I began looking at seminary's. Grad school had been on my mind for years. It was one of those unattainable dreams that you have as a kid. Until, one day... it became attainable. I was entering my senior year of college and grad school seemed like the most logical next step. Sometime around November, I began dedicating time to looking into schools.
The long version of this can be found on my Why Texas post. But just in case a quick re-cap is all you are looking for, here ya go...
In November, God said that I should go to this seminary in Fort Worth, Texas. I kind of thought that He was crazy, and gave Him three reasons I couldn't do it. He quickly squashed all of my reasons and I began to consider SWBTS as an option. In January, I spent a day with my best friend. She really challenged me. And, on my drive home, I committed to following God's lead. In March, I applied to Southwestern and I was accepted in April. In May, I told my parents and in June, I told the world. Finally, in July... I packed up all of my stuff in a Penske truck and drove over 1,000 miles from North Carolina to Texas!
That's where we pick up!! On social media, I so aptly named this journey #NCtoTX. This week, I'll be blogging about all things #NCtoTX... the emotions leading up to the journey, the three day journey and where my head and heart are now. It's going to be a great week!
Last summer, I began looking at seminary's. Grad school had been on my mind for years. It was one of those unattainable dreams that you have as a kid. Until, one day... it became attainable. I was entering my senior year of college and grad school seemed like the most logical next step. Sometime around November, I began dedicating time to looking into schools.
The long version of this can be found on my Why Texas post. But just in case a quick re-cap is all you are looking for, here ya go...
In November, God said that I should go to this seminary in Fort Worth, Texas. I kind of thought that He was crazy, and gave Him three reasons I couldn't do it. He quickly squashed all of my reasons and I began to consider SWBTS as an option. In January, I spent a day with my best friend. She really challenged me. And, on my drive home, I committed to following God's lead. In March, I applied to Southwestern and I was accepted in April. In May, I told my parents and in June, I told the world. Finally, in July... I packed up all of my stuff in a Penske truck and drove over 1,000 miles from North Carolina to Texas!
That's where we pick up!! On social media, I so aptly named this journey #NCtoTX. This week, I'll be blogging about all things #NCtoTX... the emotions leading up to the journey, the three day journey and where my head and heart are now. It's going to be a great week!
Thursday, June 27, 2013
My Praise Breaks
Early this week I wrote about what these "praise breaks" I've been tweeting about are. Today, I wanted to write a little more about these praise breaks.
We've all had moments, days, seasons of overwhelming stress. Those moments when you are following God, but it's scary. Those moments when you are asking God for something, but He doesn't seem to be listening. Those moments when you feel like God's presence has left you. You are alone, I promise.
The closer you follow God, the harder the walk with gets. If anyone promised you that this walk was going to be easy, they were lying. Satan's job is to make us doubt God. I'd even go as far as to say that if Satan isn't hassling you, you aren't going the right direction.
I have had a lot on my plate lately. I have been remembering a time that I feel like God didn't meet me at the end of a road He called me to take. It has really made me question my decision to move to Texas. I'm confident that God has called me there, but what if He does not meet me there again? When I take those thoughts a little too far, I stop to remember His faithfulness. I have a praise break, sometimes long and sometimes short. I just remind myself of how good He is. He has a plan for me in Texas.
Satan knows that God is going to do something huge in and through me in Texas. If I make this move, God wins. Satan is doing everything in his power to keep me from making that move. I will not allow Satan to have any room in my life. I want God to get all the glory.
Take praise breaks often. Refocus your mind on why you are doing what you are doing. God is still good in your struggle. Don't allow Satan to have any room to in your life. Press forward when things get tough.
We've all had moments, days, seasons of overwhelming stress. Those moments when you are following God, but it's scary. Those moments when you are asking God for something, but He doesn't seem to be listening. Those moments when you feel like God's presence has left you. You are alone, I promise.
The closer you follow God, the harder the walk with gets. If anyone promised you that this walk was going to be easy, they were lying. Satan's job is to make us doubt God. I'd even go as far as to say that if Satan isn't hassling you, you aren't going the right direction.
I have had a lot on my plate lately. I have been remembering a time that I feel like God didn't meet me at the end of a road He called me to take. It has really made me question my decision to move to Texas. I'm confident that God has called me there, but what if He does not meet me there again? When I take those thoughts a little too far, I stop to remember His faithfulness. I have a praise break, sometimes long and sometimes short. I just remind myself of how good He is. He has a plan for me in Texas.
Satan knows that God is going to do something huge in and through me in Texas. If I make this move, God wins. Satan is doing everything in his power to keep me from making that move. I will not allow Satan to have any room in my life. I want God to get all the glory.
Take praise breaks often. Refocus your mind on why you are doing what you are doing. God is still good in your struggle. Don't allow Satan to have any room to in your life. Press forward when things get tough.
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
My Passion
Earlier this week, I wrote about passion. I talked about how everyone needs to be passionate about something. We can't sit back and let life pass us by. Today, I'm going to get personal about my something.
My something is the lack of woman in ministry. As I'm moving along in my theology courses, I'm finding a terrifying trend... It's believed that woman serving in a leadership position in a church is unbiblical. That is supposed to be a place for a man. The woman's place is at home making babies and cooking dinner. This makes my blood boil. This makes me go on a tangent. This makes me loose it.
I believe as long as you are doing what God has called you to do, you are in the right position. This looks different for everyone, and no one person is doing the wrong thing even if it looks different from someone else. Before you read further, please know that I think that woman who stay at home, make babies and cook dinner are wonderful people, and as long as you are doing what God has called you to do, you are in the right place!!
I think it is terribly sexist to believe that woman can't serve in a leadership position at a church. I believe that something needs to be changed. God has called me to work in full-time ministry. I'm beginning to be slapped with the realization, that I may run into a lot of closed doors, a lot of churches who have this backwards sort of mindset.
I want to be a part of this change. I want to inspire women to step up and let God use them greatly. It may mean staying at home and changing the lives of those around you. It may mean working in the corporate world and changing lives there. Allowing God to use you greatly looks different for everyone. I think we all need to live up to this full potential. Woman, more than ever. Let's stop sitting back and letting our husbands get all of the credit.
My something is the lack of woman in ministry. As I'm moving along in my theology courses, I'm finding a terrifying trend... It's believed that woman serving in a leadership position in a church is unbiblical. That is supposed to be a place for a man. The woman's place is at home making babies and cooking dinner. This makes my blood boil. This makes me go on a tangent. This makes me loose it.
I believe as long as you are doing what God has called you to do, you are in the right position. This looks different for everyone, and no one person is doing the wrong thing even if it looks different from someone else. Before you read further, please know that I think that woman who stay at home, make babies and cook dinner are wonderful people, and as long as you are doing what God has called you to do, you are in the right place!!
I think it is terribly sexist to believe that woman can't serve in a leadership position at a church. I believe that something needs to be changed. God has called me to work in full-time ministry. I'm beginning to be slapped with the realization, that I may run into a lot of closed doors, a lot of churches who have this backwards sort of mindset.
I want to be a part of this change. I want to inspire women to step up and let God use them greatly. It may mean staying at home and changing the lives of those around you. It may mean working in the corporate world and changing lives there. Allowing God to use you greatly looks different for everyone. I think we all need to live up to this full potential. Woman, more than ever. Let's stop sitting back and letting our husbands get all of the credit.
Monday, June 17, 2013
Passion
Passion (N) - 1. Intense, driving, or overmastering feeling or conviction; an outbreak of anger.
2. Ardent affection, a strong liking or desire for or devotion to some activity, object or concept.
I believe that everyone should have something to be passionate about. Everyone should have something that get's their blood boiling when people aren't educated in the facts. Everyone should have something that they can't stop talking about if the topic is brought up. Everyone should have something.
Maybe it's sex trafficking, child homelessness, hungry children in Africa, cancer... It doesn't really matter what it is, just that you have something.\
What is your something?!
2. Ardent affection, a strong liking or desire for or devotion to some activity, object or concept.
For the purpose of this post, let's go with... A strong liking or desire for or devotion to some concept.
I believe that everyone should have something to be passionate about. Everyone should have something that get's their blood boiling when people aren't educated in the facts. Everyone should have something that they can't stop talking about if the topic is brought up. Everyone should have something.
Maybe it's sex trafficking, child homelessness, hungry children in Africa, cancer... It doesn't really matter what it is, just that you have something.\
What is your something?!
Monday, June 10, 2013
Singleness - Curse or Blessing?
Why do so many people consider being single a curse? So many people walk around saying "woah is me" while they are single. So many people get envious of their friends successful relationships while they are single. So many people get mad and ask God, "why me?!" while they are single. Why do so many people consider being single a curse?
In high school, I met who I thought was the man of my dreams. I had no desire to have children prior to meeting him, but when I met him, I thought about having his beautiful babies. I wanted to marry him and have happily ever after. Somewhere along the way, our paths went in completely different directions. After three and a half years, we walked our separate ways. We haven't seen each other since. We've talked a handful of times over the last three years, but it's just weird.
For the first year, I was the "woah is me", jealous, and asking God why it had to be me. I was a good person, was active in church, managed to hold down a full-time job and full-time hours at school, while being successful at both. I was a catch... right?
Somewhere in the midst of the second year, I found acceptance. I realized that being single wasn't a curse. I realized that being single was a blessing. I didn't have anyone else calling the shots. I didn't need to make room for anyone in by busy schedule. I realized that this time being single was a blessing. I had time to work on me. I had time to grow closer to God. I had time to "find myself".
As the third year is coming to a close and the fourth year of being single is approaching, I've found peace. I'm not worried about finding "Mr. Right." I'm more worried about becoming "Mrs. Right" and living a life that is pleasing to my husband, even though I don't know who he is yet. I am confident in God's timing and believing that He will put my husband, my prince charming, my "Mr. Right" in my life when the time is right for both of us.
Singleness isn't a disease. Singleness isn't a curse. Singleness is a blessing.
It's time to find your value and strength in Christ, instead of seeking it in a significant other. It's time to find out who you are and figure out what you want in life. It's time for you. You have your whole life to spend with your significant other. Value your "you time" now.
Enjoy these moments. Don't look at being single as a curse!
In high school, I met who I thought was the man of my dreams. I had no desire to have children prior to meeting him, but when I met him, I thought about having his beautiful babies. I wanted to marry him and have happily ever after. Somewhere along the way, our paths went in completely different directions. After three and a half years, we walked our separate ways. We haven't seen each other since. We've talked a handful of times over the last three years, but it's just weird.
For the first year, I was the "woah is me", jealous, and asking God why it had to be me. I was a good person, was active in church, managed to hold down a full-time job and full-time hours at school, while being successful at both. I was a catch... right?
Somewhere in the midst of the second year, I found acceptance. I realized that being single wasn't a curse. I realized that being single was a blessing. I didn't have anyone else calling the shots. I didn't need to make room for anyone in by busy schedule. I realized that this time being single was a blessing. I had time to work on me. I had time to grow closer to God. I had time to "find myself".
As the third year is coming to a close and the fourth year of being single is approaching, I've found peace. I'm not worried about finding "Mr. Right." I'm more worried about becoming "Mrs. Right" and living a life that is pleasing to my husband, even though I don't know who he is yet. I am confident in God's timing and believing that He will put my husband, my prince charming, my "Mr. Right" in my life when the time is right for both of us.
Singleness isn't a disease. Singleness isn't a curse. Singleness is a blessing.
It's time to find your value and strength in Christ, instead of seeking it in a significant other. It's time to find out who you are and figure out what you want in life. It's time for you. You have your whole life to spend with your significant other. Value your "you time" now.
Enjoy these moments. Don't look at being single as a curse!
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