Sunday, March 20, 2011

My God

You who answer prayer,
to you all people will come

Psalm 65:2

Every Saturday evening involves me picking Corey up for church, volunteering, going home for a dinner. I love getting a free meal from my parents. :-) This was a typical Saturday in that. Dinner conversation always consists of discussions about our work week, how volunteering went, and any other news. There is typically a bit of conversation about why I do not have a boyfriend yet.

Well, just like any Saturday dinner conversation, we had to discuss my lack of having a boyfriend. Last night, this discussion got a bit out of hand. My parents began telling me that it is time that I get over Anthony and get on with my life. "He isn't going to knock on your door one day, Keirstin." "You have to get out their, Keirstin." "You need to have some fun, Keirstin." "It's lame that you spend every Saturday night with your parents."

I always explain to them that I have not felt the need to get out there. When God feels as if it is time for me to start dating, He will move me to get out there. I do not expect God to have my future husband knock on my door one day, and it be that easy. I do know that God has always told me when it was time to do something. When it is time, He will tell me. I will know when it is time. So, I am giving them that spiel. Then my mom takes it somewhere she never has before...

Don't you think God is busy enough right now? The earthquake in Japan. Three world wars currently going on. Do you think He has time to tell you when to get out there? He doesn't have time for that.

I was officially in attack mode. My parents do not go to church, and I understand that they do not think the ways I look at things are logical. I never attack them for what they believe. I began to rattle off reasons I knew my God would tell me when it was time to get out there.
  • My God rescued me from an out of control shopping addiction by allowing me to spend my every last dime and have nothing.
  • My God had his hands on my finances when looking at the numbers said I should have hundreds of dollars less than I actually had.
  • My God allowed me to buy a car when I had no money in the bank.
  • My God knew that in April I was going to have to start paying my phone bill and I didn't have money for that. So, my God allowed for my insurance points to go away. Now, I have an extra $200 a month.
  • My God told me to write a letter to my best friend in a time of need. When I got the letter to my card, He told me not to send it yet. THREE MONTHS LATER, it was still sitting in my car, and He told me to send it. Two days later she got the card and said it was perfect timing. He knew when I was going to be in the right place to write the letter, but that it wasn't the right time for her to get the letter.
  • My God has never led me into a situation that I couldn't get out of. Every time I have had a bad situation at work, to where I needed to leave, He hasn't let me get to that point until there was somewhere else for me to go.

My mom got very defensive. I asked her if she wanted me to give her any more reasons that I knew my God would tell me when it was time for me to look for my future husband. My God has His hand on every part of my life. I told her that if her god won't listen to all of her prayers, and have his hand on every part of her life, then it isn't the same god as my God.

So, to you. I want you to take strength in this post. The earthquake in Japan can't stop Him from answering your prayers. Keep praying. Have strength. He is an awesome God. He has His hand on every part of your life. Don't forget that.

They were helped in fighting them, and God delivered the Hagrites and all their allies into their hands, because they cried out to him during the battle. He answered their prayers, because they trusted in him.
1 Chronicles 5:20

Sunday, March 13, 2011


Warning: This video contains graphic content!

I have heard this song on the radio for weeks. The first time I heard it, I knew that God wanted me to write about it. But it took me weeks to figure out what He wanted me to say. I love this song.

Pretty, pretty please/Don’t you ever, ever feel/Like you’re less than/less than perfect/Pretty, pretty please/If you ever, ever feel /Like you’re nothing/You are perfect to me

Every time I heard this song, I was so comforted. God feels this way about me. He feels this way about you. You are perfect to Him. That was all I could think of to write this post. He thinks you are perfect. As I was trying to figure out how I could make that one statement an entire blog post, I looked up the video to the song. Woah! That video broke my heart. It is so graphic. Seeing how she carved "PERFECT" into her arm, and all the blood in the tub. It killed me.

Through that, God gave me the perfect blog post. Isn't it interesting how God works. Through a bloody wrist that had "PERFECT" carved into it, I saw God.

In high school, I struggled with fitting in. I got a job to buy "nice" clothes for myself. I thought that American Eagle, Abercrombie and Hollister clothes was all it took to fit in. I pretended to have this beautiful life. As far as I was concerned, the right clothes worked. I got invited to parties and hung out with the "popular" children. But, none of that changed who I was or where I came from. I didn't come from a great, happy home. I bought my way into being popular. I was pretending to be someone I was not. Hiding who I was hurt.

My sophomore year was tough. I hated hiding who I was. I hated not being able to talk about what was going in my life. I was just always dusting things under the rug. I began cutting myself. It was such a relief. I never told anyone. To this day there is only one person who knows that I cut myself. I never felt beautiful. I never felt loved. I knew nothing about the love of Jesus Christ.

I wish I had someone to tell me this when I was in high school...

Even if you don't fit in, even if you don't have a nice car... God loves you. God sent His only Son to save you! God wants your heart. He doesn't want you to hurt yourself. He doesn't want you to hurt. He loves you! He loves you more than anyone on this Earth will ever love you. He loves you more than your future husband will love you. God loves you. Jesus Christ died for you. Jesus Christ loves you!

Are you listening? This is to you. You don't have to be in high school. You can be a 25-year-old single woman who feels like she will never get married and looks in the mirror wondering what is wrong with her. You can be a 23-year-old man who has had sex with more women than you can remember trying to feel loved. Are you listening?

Jesus Christ loves you. He died on the cross for you.

Matthew 9:10-13 says While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew's house, many tax collectors and "sinners" came and ate with him and his disciples. When the Pharisees saw this they asked his disciples, "Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and 'sinners'? On hearing this Jesus said, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy, not sacrifice,' For I have not come to all the righteous but sinners." No matter where you are coming from, it is okay. He still loves you. He came to Earth for you. Elevation Church exists for you. We don't exist for the saved. We are reaching people far from God.

I pray for the day that there is no one on this Earth who does not know the love of God. I pray for the day that there is no one who feels as if cutting themselves is the only relief to pain. I pray for the day that there is no one who feels as if killing themselves is the only way to save themselves.

Jesus loves you! Take heart in that!

In deed, the vary hairs of your head are all numbered. Don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. (Luke 12:7)

Wednesday, March 9, 2011


"Even now," declares the Lord, "return to me with all your heart, with fasting and weeping and mourning." Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity.
Joel 2:12-13

Today is Ash Wednesday. Ash Wednesday is the beginning of lent. Lent is a 40 day period of fasting. There are six Sundays in lent which do not count in the 40 days because these Sundays are meant to be "mini-Easters". Lent is about the opportunity to regain self-control.

I have never fasted from anything for lent. This year will be the first year, and I am excited about this experience. I will be fasting from fast food. This will be an amazing time for me. I enjoy running through a drive thru on my lunch break. It is my escape from work. This time will allow me to focus on God on my lunch break rather than what I eat.

What will you be fasting from for lent?

Monday, March 7, 2011


Yikes. I haven't posted in a month. Let me tell you what is going on.

My grandpa and great grandpa are both very sick. They have both been in and out of the hospital this month. I took today off, and spent the weekend down there. I wanted to have a chance to spend some quality time with them.

I am working on spending more time with me and God than on the computer. I spend all of my free time on the computer. My goal for March is to only turn my computer on after I have spent quality time in the Bible and with the Lord. The fast showed me how little time I devote to God. I am considering fasting for three days at the beginning of every month to get myself back on track with the Lord, to start the months fresh.

I have realized that my reading is sparatic. I do not want that anymore. I have committment issues. So, instead of commiting to a year long Bible reading plan, I am commiting to shorter plans. Today, I finished a five day reading plan. It was titled "Why does God love me?" I will share what I learned from that soon. Tomorrow, I will begin "Deep Dive 14." This is a 14 day plan that takes you into some more important parts of the Bible to kick start your Bible knowledge.

God is so good to me. This month has been amazing. I had the opportunity to attend a coordinator/eKidz staff meeting as a guest of my coordinator. She asked me to step on board as a coordinator. I am so excited about this transition. He has placed amazing people in my life who believe in me! They see the leadership that God has placed in me, and want me to use it to my fullest capacity. They are always taking me outside of my comfort zone. I can't wait! :-)

I am learning new things from Him on a daily basis. I am so thankful to have His hand on my life. I am unworthy, so I praise Him constantly for it.

I'll leave you with this...

Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.
Jeremiah 29:12